TED NUGENT

I think Ted Nugent is a funny guy. Sigh. But this song just sucks. Well, every song he has sucks. Wang Tango? Lame.

_________________________________________________________________

JOURNEY

um

“And being apart ain’t easy
On this love affair
Two strangers learn to fall in love again
I get the joy
Of rediscovering you
Oh girl, you stand by me
I’m forever yours…faithfully”

I just wonder if Steve Perry had a dad, and if so, why in the blue fuck did his dad not bitch slap him for sounding like such a pussy? I thought the point of being a rock star was to avoid having to pine away for girls like this. Pussy.

______________________________________________________________________________

JUDAS PRIEST

When I found out that Rob Halpert was gay, I sighed, and thought… “That makes sense.” Turbo lover? Who sings a song bragging about being a two pump chump… Even if you are sticking it in the pooper.

_______________________________________________________________________

DEF LEPPARD

I know you might be thinking about how talented a drummer has to be to play with one arm. I have another spin on that. How simple does your music have to be for a guy with one arm to be able to keep up.

The video above is lame, but the lyrics to every body’s favorite bar song “Pour some Sugar on Me”…

“Love is like a bomb, baby, c’mon get it on
Livin’ like a lover with a radar phone
Lookin’ like a tramp, like a video vamp
Demolition woman, can I be your man?
Razzle ‘n’ a dazzle ‘n’ a flash a little light
Television lover, baby, go all night
Sometime, anytime, sugar me sweet
Little miss ah innocent sugar me, yeah”

Uh… what? FYI, these guys didn’t even write their own music. The same guy that wrote for Bryan Adams wrote for them.

_________________________________________________________________________

VAN HAGAR

How does a band go from songs like Running with the Devil, Unchained, and Everybody wants some to this?

“We’ll get higher and higher straight up we’ll climb
We’ll get higher and higher leave it all behind
So baby dry your eyes, save all the tears you’ve cried
Ohh that’s what dreams are made of
Oh baby we belong in a world that must be strong
Ohh that’s what dreams are made of”

Sammy Hagar pulled an amazing transformation from Hallmark card writer to heavy metal front man.

___________________________________________________________________________________

POISON

This picture says it all.

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket

Unskinny Bop? OK… That says it too.

_________________________________________________________________________

OFFSPRING

NICE BRAIDS!

“Late at night she knocks on my door
Drunk again and looking to score
Now I know I should say no
But that’s kind of hard when she’s ready to go
I may be dumb
But I’m not a dweeb
I’m just a sucker with no self esteem”

What high school note did these guys intercept to come up with these lyrics? “I may be dumb”? Wait wait wait! Yes you are!

__________________________________________________________________

NICKELBACK

I was in Portugal once. Here is what I did to become a local hero. Too bad the girls there don’t shave their pits.

“That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you’ll be with me
and you’ll never go
Stop breathing if
I don’t see you anymore”

How did these guys go from listening to Pearl Jam and Nirvana to writing lyrics that Mariah Carey would deem to soft? If I see one more myspace page with a Nickelback song, I am going to kick the next baby I see.

_________________________________________________________________________

BUCKCHERRY

Um, is this a rock band or a flavor of Clearly Canadian? Some of you are saying, “I like that song.” But read this shit out loud and ask yourself how fuckin silly you sound.

Break me down, you got a lovely face going to your place now you got to freak me out

Scream so loud, getting fucking laid you want me to stay but I got to make my way

Hey! You’re a crazy bitch but you fuck so good I’m on top of it

When I dream I’m doing you all night scratches all down my back to keep me right on

LAME

_________________________________________________

Which of these bands will you admit to being a suck for at some point in your life?

Do you have someone better?

Tags: , , , , , , ,

Like this post? Buy me a beer.


Read More   


41 Comments

Autumn Lee 2007-05-20 18:45:49

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

You forgot Winger…LOL!

 
SUPERJABS 2007-05-20 18:47:56

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

obvious

 
Genevieve 2007-05-20 18:51:14

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

you also forgot Trixter and Danger Danger

SUPERJABS 2007-05-20 18:56:45

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

but they weren’t very popular

Genevieve 2007-05-20 19:02:51

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

true - I was a big hair band fan so it’s hard for me to rip on them but I do have to say that I did like a lot of them b/cuz some were cute such as Skid Row…I mean, they really are not good musician’s if you think about it…but Sebastien was able to lead them ahead with his vocals…thats for sure

 
 
 
Katie 2007-05-20 18:54:47

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

I cant believe you are bashing Journey..

SOme where in the NIGHT!!!!!!

DONT STOP believing!

I love that song and that will never change

I am also a huge fan of Eddie Money

Take me home tonight

 
SUPERJABS 2007-05-20 18:57:29

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

Read those lyrics… come on

jimmy 2007-05-22 18:56:18

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

Read the lyrics of todays music. Jesus, talk about STUPID.

 
 
Lecierz605 2007-05-20 18:57:48

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

Hahahaha! Being as I’m only 20 (almost 21) most of these were before my time so I didn’t have to listen to them growing up, thankfully. Although I know just about all of them, and I’m not HUGE fans of their music either. I have to admit I like “Pour Some Sugar On Me” though, and some of the Journey songs too.

That “Crazy Bitch” song got on my nerves pretty quick though. A lot of people love songs, until they actually sit down and read the lyrics. Then they wonder what the hell the person was on when they came up with the song, or at least I do.

Great choices though, as to who is lame! I can’t think of any others right now.

 
SUPERJABS 2007-05-20 19:00:47

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

THAT BUCKCHERRY SONG IS SO FUCKING TERRIBLE

Lecierz605 2007-05-20 19:03:00

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

I agree!

That “Stay Fly” song got on my ever loving last nerve too! And Gwen Stefani’s “Hollaback Girl” and “Wind It Up” or whatever in the hell the name of that annoying ass song was!

baby bear 2007-05-20 19:07:30

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

we stay fly .. no lie .. you know this hahahahah :P
LOVE Gwen Stefani too btw ….I aint no hollaback girl :p
this shit is bannanas haha :p

 
 
 
baby bear 2007-05-20 19:01:56

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

silly super jabs .. green with jealousy just isn’t that pretty of a color on you …. outside of 2 bands you picked 1’s from the 80/s early 90’s .. HELLLOOOO .. things were diff. than. Than they were popular .. posion and def. leapard .. till some of my fav’s .. even motley crew :) … You can laugh and make fun and blah blah .. but sweety they are the one’s that was laughen there asses off to the bank. don’t be a hater :p
Nickleback is an awsome band too btw… rockstar is an awsome song. I have a feeling you too deep down really like this music ….. or at some point you must have been jamming to it .. I doubt very much so you suddenly just came accross all this .. you love/ed it as much as the rest of us. :P

SUPERJABS 2007-05-20 19:06:32

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

JEALOUSY?

Are you saying that you can’t hate a band without being jealous?

Here…

Your taste in music sucks.

baby bear 2007-05-20 19:13:11

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

ahhhhh and thats ok that you feel that way :p lmao .. but when this music came out it was very popular so I guess most of us have sucky music taste :p

jealouse of the wealth/fame they got from these songs … as J.T says in his song with timbaland ( sp? ) don’t hate on them just cause you didn’t come up with iiiiit :p

sooo what music do you suggest your lil fallowers to listen to??

rachel 2007-05-20 21:57:55

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

Most people do have “sucky music taste”. That’s exactly what he’s saying.

(Comments wont nest below this level)
 
 
jimmy 2007-05-22 18:58:09

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

Sounds like jealousy to me.

 
 
 
Victoria 2007-05-20 19:20:51

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

Damn Jabs….love Nickleback, Def leppard, and Journey so bite me!

 
baby_ bear 2007-05-20 19:25:16

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

only song that really confused the crud outa me is that 1 Nelly song tho … something like shimmy shimmy cocoa puffs listen to me now .. down down baby …. something something something lol boom boom baby ready to let it go …????????? what is that all about ?????

jimmy 2007-05-22 15:22:43

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

Basically all those hip hop songs say in a nut shell, is lets fuck, you wothless HO.

 
 
debbie 2007-05-20 20:00:02

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

I agree most 80’s and rock bands do suck…thats why I listen to opera and blues…opera feeds the soul …blues tickles my mind.

jimmy 2007-05-22 15:21:40

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

Most of the 80’s rock bands were awsome. I don’t listen to opera, but I do like blues. A couple of those 80’s bands, Great White, and Cinderella played some of the best blues rock ever recorded.

 
 
Nate 2007-05-20 20:07:50

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

Steve Perry was sportin’ the child molester mustache! Offspring has a few good songs and a lot of silly songs aimed towards 13 year olds. The no self esteem song is one of them…I wouldn’t have a problem if one of my ex girlfriends came over “to score”. Hell, free sex…easy.

You probably should have included Blink 182.

 
Joe 2007-05-20 21:53:04

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

The Nug was and still is one of the best guitar players in the biz, even if he is slightly insane! That is his only talent, his songs pretty much suck but he can play like a MOFO! As for Journey….They FUCKING ROCK! Now then on with the rest…Priest, Leppard, Offspring, Sammy Hagar,Poison,Buckcherry, They all pretty much suck, Oh sure there was a time when I liked Def Leppard, but when Elliot performed in concert wearing his own bands T-shirt, well that just did it for me, it doesn’t get any more lame than that!Hagar destroyed a perfectly good rock and roll band, The rest suck ass, and I will refrain from passing judgement on Nickelback, so far they have remaind consistant in their work.

 
rachel 2007-05-20 21:55:03

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

Bless your heart, Jabs. You’ve made me very happy.

 
Suzi 2007-05-20 22:38:35

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

Ted is awesome! I have liked all these bands at one time or another. Journey was huge for me in high school. I can do without Def Leppard but when I was 18, that was all over the radio for sure. Older Journey is very good, even with Steve Perry. I’m not defending their lameness, some of it really sucks though. Judas Priest should not even be on your list. But to each his own. Buckcherry has older stuff that’s not so bad.

Who I can’t stand now is Matisyahu, Gnarls Barkley and that James Blunt guy. And from the olden days, I’m not a Springsteen or Bob Seger fan at all.

 
grace 2007-05-20 23:34:02

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

i admit, i loved the offspring growing up. their only good album though was smash the one released in 1994. after that, they went soft, and therefore started sucking. i actually read an article in the newspaper today in which the writer was actually encouraging singers like james blunt and snow patrol, to keep doing what they’re doing cause apparently the ladies really like it when a guy becomes emotional and bares his soul. so looks like we may unfortunatly seeing more of the whiny bitch james blunt types.

 
princessivonne 2007-05-21 11:13:55

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

I can’t help but still love Poison. They are a guilty pleasure.

jimmy 2007-05-22 15:17:54

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

Guilty. Get real darlin’. Those guys were, and still are one of the best bands in rock history.

 
 
crystal 2007-05-21 11:45:01

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

Spot On!
(except for Journey)

 
rodney 2007-05-21 13:07:39

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

everyone mentioned, plus every band on all corporate playlists. nothing but dumbed down kiddie rock. same old tired verse chorus verse structure whored out to all genres of music. and to think some kids think bands like nickelback are metal! there has to be a computer somewhere writing all these pathetic songs. thanks for the fake memories, corporate radio!

 
tony 2007-05-21 13:45:57

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

i have to admit some of these bands suck sammy and ted no way though ted is great

 
dawn 2007-05-21 15:34:04

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

OKAY, YOU GOT ME. I’M A SUCKER FOR ALL OF THEM EXCEPT TED NUGENT AND JUDAS PRIEST. NEVER LIKED EITHER OF THOSE. ALL OF THESE I LIKED MOSTLY WHEN I WAS YOUNGER. NICKEL BACK I LIKE NOW AND BUCKCHERRY I HAD ON MY PAGE AS A JOKE ONE TIME. WHAT CAN I SAY, I LIKE THE WORD FUCK!!! I WASN’T THAT CRAZY FOR POISON BACK IN THE DAY. BUT I LIKE TO LISTEN TO ALL KINDS OF MUSIC DEPENDING ON MY MOOD AT THE TIME.

 
Cami 2007-05-21 15:47:18

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

Man, out of the 9 you chose, I have 7 on my ipod. Does that make me a loser? :)

 
Natasha Moats 2007-05-21 16:07:10

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

Journey come one dude….seriously are you just hating because you are not as rich as them?!?!?! HA HA LOL

I would have to say I agree with Nickelback- they are so gay and so is Hinder.

FYI- At least you can understand these lyrics, like them or not. Most music listened to now you can’t even understand what the lyrics are saying; all you ever hear people saying is “I love this beat” =/

 
Aaron 2007-05-21 16:24:39

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

Um, where’s Creed?

jimmy 2007-05-22 15:15:59

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

He probably thinks they suck too. I would have to agree with him if he did. Scott Saap is a cheap rip off of Eddie Vedder.

 
 
Kristie Lynn 2007-05-21 19:46:13

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

You know, I haven’t heard any of those songs ever

I am so not into rock music

so… I was asking if you knew how to get rid of this empty man face instead of mine? It shows up A-OK on the website but not here…

 
Carolyn 2007-05-22 14:02:10

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

Stranglehold is an amazing song… even Maynard thinks so.
the Nugg cant be that bad then.

 
SuperDuperMel 2007-05-22 14:57:08

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

I like Nickelback… and I’m not soft. Not all there songs are soft.

Actually Animal is a good nick song.

So fuck you jingle balls!

Just kiddin’

 
jimmy 2007-05-22 15:14:32

See my profile on MyBlogLog.com!

Ah Jabs, trying to diss the rockers huh?? Well, even at your best, you would be way down the ladder from these rockers. You have a bad case of what I call penis envy. I mean really, they are world famous, can get any chick they want, have lots of money, and what do you have? A website that you blog on. Get real bro. To quote AC/DC, Rock N Roll ain’t noize pollution, Rock N Roll is just Rock N Roll.

 

Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.