“And being apart ain’t easy
On this love affair
Two strangers learn to fall in love again
I get the joy
Of rediscovering you
Oh girl, you stand by me
I’m forever yours…faithfully”
I just wonder if Steve Perry had a dad, and if so, why in the blue fuck did his dad not bitch slap him for sounding like such a pussy? I thought the point of being a rock star was to avoid having to pine away for girls like this. Pussy.
When I found out that Rob Halpert was gay, I sighed, and thought… “That makes sense.” Turbo lover? Who sings a song bragging about being a two pump chump… Even if you are sticking it in the pooper.
I know you might be thinking about how talented a drummer has to be to play with one arm. I have another spin on that. How simple does your music have to be for a guy with one arm to be able to keep up.
The video above is lame, but the lyrics to every body’s favorite bar song “Pour some Sugar on Me”…
“Love is like a bomb, baby, c’mon get it on
Livin’ like a lover with a radar phone
Lookin’ like a tramp, like a video vamp
Demolition woman, can I be your man?
Razzle ‘n’ a dazzle ‘n’ a flash a little light
Television lover, baby, go all night
Sometime, anytime, sugar me sweet
Little miss ah innocent sugar me, yeah”
Uh… what? FYI, these guys didn’t even write their own music. The same guy that wrote for Bryan Adams wrote for them.
How does a band go from songs like Running with the Devil, Unchained, and Everybody wants some to this?
“We’ll get higher and higher straight up we’ll climb
We’ll get higher and higher leave it all behind
So baby dry your eyes, save all the tears you’ve cried
Ohh that’s what dreams are made of
Oh baby we belong in a world that must be strong
Ohh that’s what dreams are made of”
Sammy Hagar pulled an amazing transformation from Hallmark card writer to heavy metal front man.
“Late at night she knocks on my door
Drunk again and looking to score
Now I know I should say no
But that’s kind of hard when she’s ready to go
I may be dumb
But I’m not a dweeb
I’m just a sucker with no self esteem”
What high school note did these guys intercept to come up with these lyrics? “I may be dumb”? Wait wait wait! Yes you are!
I was in Portugal once. Here is what I did to become a local hero. Too bad the girls there don’t shave their pits.
“That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you’ll be with me
and you’ll never go
Stop breathing if
I don’t see you anymore”
How did these guys go from listening to Pearl Jam and Nirvana to writing lyrics that Mariah Carey would deem to soft? If I see one more myspace page with a Nickelback song, I am going to kick the next baby I see.
Um, is this a rock band or a flavor of Clearly Canadian? Some of you are saying, “I like that song.” But read this shit out loud and ask yourself how fuckin silly you sound.
Break me down, you got a lovely face going to your place now you got to freak me out
Scream so loud, getting fucking laid you want me to stay but I got to make my way
Hey! You’re a crazy bitch but you fuck so good I’m on top of it
When I dream I’m doing you all night scratches all down my back to keep me right on
LAME
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Which of these bands will you admit to being a suck for at some point in your life?
